Even when you’re going through it,

You’re not going through it;

You’re tiptoeing around,

Careful not to step on

Your own thoughts, your own feelings. 

You don’t really want to talk about it;

You don’t really want to write about it.

You only want to think about, write about 

Nothing at all.

The nothingness that stares you in the face,

The nothingness that will never be nothing again,

The life that will never be the same.


My Calling Is Higher Than A Slot On TV

Hey there. Not sure what you’re working on right now but I was hoping to bug you for a minute. Is that ok? I need to vent. Sometimes I just need to talk to someone that understands what I’m trying to do, someone that knows this isn’t about me.

You know what I’m trying to do right? You, another Christian like myself, should know that I’m not after fame. I could care less about fortune. At the end of the day, all I really care about is Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.

There are people out there still trying to take advantage of me. They see my love for God and think that surely I want to spend money to make myself famous singing for my Savior. Nothing could be further from the truth. I wish they understood like you do that saving people is more important than my music. This music thing is a part-time gig; my full-time job is ministry.

I don’t want to sell my soul for fame. And I surely don’t want to sell my God for fame either.

Ok, vent over.

Renewed Purpose


I’ve learned that part of surrendering myself to God is writing songs that praise Him rather than as an afterthought prayer to make the pain go away. When I was a baby Christian, I didn’t know any other way to approach Him but I see Him working in me now.

I feel the difference. I trust Him more, and from that trust, I can praise Him in even my darkest hour because His ways are better than mine. I can praise Him and truly rejoice in everything that He is. Thank you Jesus for saving me, for giving me new life, for continuing to convict me, and for calling me to worship.

Today I sing a new song, a song of renewed purpose to bring you glory.

No One Special

I am no one special. Really, as far as this world goes, who I am doesn’t matter. There is no need for applause. There is no need for a great following or a loud cheer. I could delete all of my followers, put down my music, and never sing another note. Jesus would still love me. I am not here for the praise of man but to praise the one who gave His life for me. So if I must sing, I will do it for Him.

If I am hated by every man, and thrown into jail for speaking about my faith and sharing the Gospel, it wouldn’t make me a better or worse person. There is no martyr greater than Jesus, and I am humbled in knowing Him. I am humbled when in the trenches because I know that my sacrifices will never compare to what He has done for me.

I am no one special. All that is good about me came from Him. Everything beautiful and wonderful, everything that instills joy and leaves one with hope is of Him. I am no one special, but my Jesus is everything special to me.


For more information about Kristeen Nicole Gillooly, her music, and her ministry, please visit http://www.kngmusicministry.com or her artist site at http://www.kristeennicolegillooly.com. To learn more about Jesus, please reach for your closest bible. If you are in need of a bible and cannot afford one, please visit http://worldbibleproject.org/request-a-free-bible/


I Sing Thee Name

Someone asked me why I sing. I sing because His love for me is overwhelming. I sing because I am still a sinner, and I need my Savior. I sing to express my love for Him, and to honor Him for all that He has done for me.

Why do you sing for Jesus?

For more information about Kristeen Nicole Gillooly, her music, and her ministry, please visit http://www.kngmusicministry.com or her artist site at http://www.kristeennicolegillooly.com. To learn more about Jesus, please reach for your closest bible. If you are in need of a bible and cannot afford one, please visit http://worldbibleproject.org/request-a-free-bible/

Oh, How I Need You

It’s here again…

the stress, the worry, the fear;

The closer I get to you,

The more I realize

How far away I truly am.


I want to surrender,

I want to be free from this world

But still the shackles remain.


I am scared of dying,

Fearful of being hurt;

And I know you can take

These things away from me.


I’ve been praying for release,

Praying that you will protect me

But maybe I’m doing it all wrong.

Maybe I’m supposed to be

Trusting instead of praying;

Maybe I’m supposed to be

Faithful instead of scared.



Can you still love me

While consumed with such fear?

Can you forgive me, knowing that

Day after day I’m still here?


I’m not good enough

To stand next to you;

I’m not good enough 

To reach out to you with one hand

And be chained to the world with the other.


But I still need you.

Oh, how I need you.



Praying For You

I know you hear me Lord. I know you hear the cries of my heart. They are screaming for you to save someone I love, to save someone that desperately needs you. It’s happening all over again isn’t?

“Sitting here in the dark
Waiting on a miracle;
Don’t know what to think
Not much that I can do.
So I just keep praying, I am praying for you;
And when the sun is going down,
I’ll still be praying for you.”

I wrote this song so long ago, for a different person, under very different circumstances but my prayer is the same. I’m praying for you to reach down and save her from disease and pain, from fear and uncertainty. I’m praying for a miracle.

“He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in whom I trust.
Surely, He will save you…” 

It Has Come To My Attention That…

The Devil sure likes to get in the way. It was supposed to be simple – click on the link, be taken to our ministry page…

A sincere apology to everyone that tried to listen to the interview I did on my husband’s show, “Faith Matters” in the segment Come As You Are. I mentioned it in my last post and even provided the link that would take them directly to my website. I’m just now finding out that over 100 people tried to listen to that interview and were not able to.

Asking people if they could be happy while not being Christian sparked quite the conversation but I would love if you could listen to what sparked the debate in the first place. You can listen to the interview here.

God Bless,


Miracle in the Making – Part 3

So, it turns out that I’m not going to make it in the radiologist business. I suppose that makes sense considering that I’ve never gone to school for such a thing and the only experience I’ve ever had doing such work was reading one set of ultrasound results. Oh, did I mention that they were my results? That’s right folks, I revealed in my last post that I crumbled under the weight of stress and impatience and tried to read my own ultrasound results so that  I could learn more about my fibroids. Thankfully, my recent trip to a gynecologist revealed more than just my unmentionables (sigh), and with that I can tell you that there is good news and bad news.

First, the bad news…

I do have fibroids but that’s not what has been causing me so much trouble these last few months. I can blame that on my actual reproductive system misbehaving instead of being the good girl I’ve always known her to be. I could go into details and give you all of the nitty gritty but out of respect for the gentleman reading this post, let’s just leave those specifics in the comments section ladies. BUT the good news is that there aren’t as many fibroids as I thought there were and they’re not as big (see, I told you I wouldn’t make a good radiologist). I was given medicine for the other issue the doctor found but it didn’t work so I guess I’ll be seeing him again. All in all, we’ve still got lots to dance about! **Intermission – let’s do the Carlton dance!** Okay, okay, I know you are probably breathing heavy like me right now after all of that dancing but let’s get back to the point…

I let fear get the best of me.

God was in control the whole time.

Fear is a funny thing that can drive you to do all kinds of things you wouldn’t do under normal circumstances. I let my fear make matters worse. Here I was, thinking that I needed surgery but God knew better. It took so long for me to relax about this situation because I was going through so many things and I admittedly was scared. Still, at least three weeks before my doctor’s appointment, I started hearing His whisper that I wouldn’t need surgery. I wanted to believe this so bad… but after such an ordeal, I didn’t know what to believe.

Trusting God is like climbing a ladder.

You have to look up lest you fall down.

I stayed on my fear ladder for quite some time, afraid to look up and afraid to fall down. God showed me that it was never a serious ordeal to begin with but I feel like I lost two months of my life while I stayed there in limbo. In the end, my faith recovered, but was it really worth stressing over? In hindsight, no. We will never have a complete picture in this life. We will always have to make decisions based on little information and big assumptions. That’s one of the reasons we need God on our side, to take some of the pressure off, and to help us see the miracles.

So wait, what is this miracle in the making then?

Simply put, the miracle is the result of faith when we do put our trust in God. It’s not just reassurance in the end that we have to look forward to but also God’s blessings because we dared to believe in Him. No matter what is going on in our lives, He has always had an escape plan ready to execute when times get tough. We just have to be willing to turn those corners with our eyes closed and know that we will come out safely on the other side. We might get this faith thing right  9 out of 10 times and feel like a champ, but then fall down once and still get bruised. Thankfully, God knows that we are not perfect and that we will trip up sometimes.

There is always room for more faith in our lives.

Thankfully, there is always room for more miracles in our lives too.

This is the last segment in the “Miracle in the Making” blog series. We encourage you to continue your own faith journey and challenge yourself to turn to God more than you do fear. For more information about Kristeen Nicole Gillooly, her music and her ministry, please visit http://www.kngmusicministry.com. You can also visit her artist website at http://www.kristeennicolegillooly.com.